faboo mama

I’ve been miserable, tired and busy…I’m sorry. I’m also working on a convention for next year and I’m doing a lot more work on it than I thought I would be.

I finally got my MediCal card and saw an OB on 16th. Kinda sucks, she’s out of town now AND the office is moving, so I had to make my 2nd appt. at a different office for the 17th of June. Can you believe that? By the 17th, I’ll be 14 weeks and with no ultrasound or real sense of pregnancy. Does that make sense? Yes, I’m getting bigger and I’m sick, but I still worry that the fetus will just up and die. When I mentioned my concerns to the receptionist, she said, “Well you’ll know if you’re having a miscarriage because there’ll be blood…just go to the ER.” Well, okay then! That makes me feel much better. Much, much fucking better. Now, with my history of miscarriages, I should be considered high risk, but I guess since I’m on MediCal, no one really gives a shit. I just may need to find a new OB. I really want to deliver at Cedars because they have private rooms. It’s just that I need to find an OB who delivers at Cedars AND takes MediCal AND is taking on new patients.

Anyway, it seems like I’ve gained 10 lbs. No lie. When I was at the doctor’s office, they weighed me and it said 237. You know, there are professional footballers, that I outweigh. Anyway, I gasped and stuff and when I got home weighed myself and sure as shit, my scale said 230. So I gained 10 freakin’ pounds and the first trimester won’t be over for another 6 days. With Ilia, I think I gained between 5 - 7 lbs. my first trimester. I am eating a lot and being so tired, I’m not exercising at all. I can barely walk down the street without wanting to pass out. Also, I used to take Ilia on hour long walks around the block twice a day. Now twice a day, I beg her to “let mommy rest”. Poor baby, I feel so sorry for her, but damn, I’m tired!

11w1d
Weight: 230
# of Meals eaten: 6
Symptoms:

• Morning sickness
• Gas
• Cravings
• Constipation
• fatigue
• Cramps
• Saliva

Anyway, it’s Memorial Day weekend. Luckily, one client paid us yesterday and hopefully, we’ll get a check from another client today. Things have been really, really bad over here financially. We’re totally behind on all our bills: In April, our car almost got repossessed (I’m still pissed about that), but my uncle loaned me money to pay for it. Speaking of which, he still hasn’t cashed the check we sent him, so I need to call him on that. Our tags are expired AND if we don’t pay our insurance by June 8th, that will be cancelled too. Our electricity almost got turned off on Tues. It would really help if I could get the time to get my website updated and start selling stuff again.

BUT silver lining: I posted on DailyKos one day and one of the C&J Bobbettes, asked me to email her. I did and she asked for my PayPal info. How awesome is this? They raised money to help me with prenatal care! So, I have that socked away so I can pay for labs and stuff. Yay!!!

I hope everyone has a great Memorial Day weekend. We’re most likely going to run up to Forest Lawn to lay flowers at the graves of Adrian’s grandmother and father, who are buried on opposite ends of the park. Anyway, I know it’s party weekend, kick off for summer, but please take the time to remember those who have gone before us. Oh, and a special hug for Minnesota State Senator Becky Lourey who’s son, Chief Warrant Officer Matthew Lourey was shot down in Iraq the other day. Also hugs to Ligaya Lagman whose son, Army Staff Sgt. Anthony Lagman, was killed last year in Afghanistan. The Goldstar Moms are unwilling to help Ms. Lagman because, she’s not a US citizen, even though she’s a taxpayer. You can read more here and here. You can email the Goldstar Moms about their horribly racist “policy”. Let me just add in here, that it’s not just the racist part of their policy I have trouble with, there is also:

Natural Mothers, who are citizens of the United States of America or of the Territorial and Insular Possessions of the United States of America, whose sons and daughters served and died in line of duty in the Armed Forces of the United States of America or its Allies, or died as a result of injuries sustained in such service, are eligible for membership in American Gold Star Mothers, Inc. Adoptive Mothers and Stepmothers who reared the child from the age of five years whose natural mother is deceased, are also eligible under the above conditions.

I fail to understand how an adoptive mother, can find out if the birth mother is deceased. I also don’t understand why a step-mother, who may have raised the kid better than its birth-mom would have, is undermined by these rules. I fear the Goldstar Moms are in danger of becoming archaic and irrelevant if they decide to continue on this path.

You can also contact Ms. Lagman to show your support at:

Lydia Lagman c/o
LTC. Sam DiRienzo Post 2285
Veterans of Foreign Wars
433 White Plains Rd
Eastchester, NY 10709
(914) 793-4998

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