I should publish my phone logs for the past week. Peak came on Monday with 15 calls from Countrywide. Other than that we average about 10 calls a day from them. These calls are sales calls. Annoying ass sales calls.

We closed on our house in Dec. 2006. The first sales call we go to refinance our loan was in March ‘07. Huh? Why would I refinance? I’m not happy with our mortgage, I’m happy with the piece of mind that we locked in an okay rate, and didn’t have to pay PMI. We put down 20% and we feel invested in this house. I repeat, why would I refinance?

“Oh. Can we speak to your husband?”

Bite me.

These calls have been coming 2 - 4 times a month. Whatever. I got Caller ID. I can ignore a call. Yet, lately it’s becoming downright obnoxious. We no longer go to the phone to see who it is. If it ain’t Countrywide, it’s Citicard whining about me paying them. Pffft.

This morning I’m reading the newspaper and am greated with this headline:

Lender seeks to shed loans

Countrywide pushes customers with exotic mortgages to refinance to traditional ones that are easier to sell off.

OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!

I read a little further:

Countrywide has authorized employees to knock 1 percentage point off its usual loan-origination fees, waive steep prepayment penalties on existing loans and loosen certain other requirements that would normally apply. If that doesn’t work, salespeople are to quickly “elevate any/all issues” to their supervising vice president, a directive says.

And I thought they actually cared about me.

The documents describing the program make clear that the replacement loans must be “conforming” — adhering to the standards of Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae — or “government loans,” the highly documented mortgages that can be backed by the FHA or VA.

“You must figure out how to originate every loan as a Conforming or Government loan!” the instructions read. “Ineligible Loan Types: Do not originate!!!”

The instructions also spell out how to make computerized “exception requests” — attempts to win approval for loans that don’t meet regular standards for refinancing — and to contact supervising “sales leaders” to review the requests.

I can just see the script with with Word clipart of a Manager. To make it me feel even less special, the kind, soothing words uttered by Bruce, Todd and Marjorie yesterday all part of that script!

If borrowers ask why they are being pitched a new loan, loan officers are told to reply: “As you may have read in recent news articles, Countrywide is committed to ensuring our borrowers are in the best situation possible. We want to help you by determining if we can significantly improve your mortgage rate and payment.”

Translation: We want to help you help us extend this scam a bit longer, by foisting onto the gov’t.

While I’m not happy that my stupid bank is now in charge of my stupid mortgage. I’m even more unhappy at being treated like I’m stupid.

The Now I know why Countrywide calls me 15 times a day by faboo mama, unless otherwise expressly stated, is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.